Heyyyyyyyyyy how about them Power Rangers? Here’s Zoey.

NAME: Zoey Reeves
RANGER DESIGNATION: Grid Battleforce Yellow Ranger, Power Rangers Beast Morphers
BASE OF OPERATION: Coral Harbor
FIRST APPEARANCE: “Beasts Unleashed” – Power Rangers Beast Morphers
LAST APPEARANCE: “Evox Unleashed” – Power Rangers Beast Morphers
PERSONAL WEAPONS/GEAR: Jax the Beast Bot; Yellow Morph-X Key; Enhanced Agility; Crippling Carrot Addiction
ZORDS: Chopper Zord
PORTRAYED BY: Jacqueline Scislowski

PROFILE

Zoey Reeves began her career as a Grid Battleforce cadet before getting cut and transferred to laundry duty. In spite of all this, she still had big dreams of making a difference and using the power of Morph-X to change the world. Her dreams came true much sooner than she anticipated when the evil computer virus Evox attacked GB headquarters through the Morphin Grid during the creation of their new team of Power Rangers.

The virus turned two of the selected Ranger recruits, Blaze and Roxy, into evil digital avatars, and Zoey found herself fighting to stop them. Out of desperation, scientist Nate Silva forced the Ranger morph on her, bonding her with the DNA of a jackrabbit and transforming her into the Yellow Ranger. The newly minted Grid Battleforce Rangers — Zoey, cadet Ravi, and trespasser/gamer/Mayor’s son Devon — stopped Blaze and Roxy from ruining everything that the organization had worked for.

Well, just for a little while. There’s another 40ish episodes of hijinks. Keep up.

It’s a good thing Zoey had the ambition and drive to be a Power Ranger, since the responsibility was thrust upon her out of nowhere. With Roxy incapacitated, she really had no choice but to fill in for her in the meantime. She was loyal to her home of Coral Harbor and Grid Battleforce’s cause, and passionate about creating renewable energy solutions. She should really consider running for office someday, but “state-appointed superhero” isn’t too bad either.

Nate took it upon himself to realize Zoey’s idea of Morph-X powered bikes. She pitched the concept to Mayor Daniels as an alternative to tearing down a forest to make more roads, and he was open to it so long as she could convince enough people to rent them for riding around town. They were literally just bicycles with little green tubes in them. You still had to pedal. People weren’t into it, but Zoey wasn’t about to concede. They just had to make the bikes cooler, then people wouldn’t want to drive their cars, right?

Unfortunately, the bikes were an easy target for Blaze to harvest some Morph-X for Evox’s revival and powering Robotrons. When the Rangers confronted him, it resulted in a high-speed bike chase. Thanks to Zoey’s mom — news anchor Muriel Reeves — the Rangers’ cool bike flips and shit were caught on camera for the world to see on TV. This was good enough to sway the rest of Coral Harbor into giving them a chance and the destructive new road project was cancelled.

When the clumsy buffoons Ben and Betty accidentally busted Devon’s new VR headset, Zoey took the fall, thinking he’d be less mad at her than them… for some reason. It worked and he sort of looked past it for a while, until he caught Zoey in the lie and she fessed up. But now one of their new evil monster detectors was mysteriously left unassembled on the ground. With his trust in Zoey having already been betrayed, Devon laid the blame on her.

As we’re all aware, a broken video game and a potentially life-saving evil robot sensor are both things that a Power Ranger would lie about. Zoey stormed out of the room, with Jax close behind trying to reason with her. She shooed him off, knowing full well that the Beast Bots can’t have too much screen time or else they might become actual characters. Devon and Zoey made up but the whole thing was petty anyway. I’ll save it for Devon’s entry.

Nate and Zoey grew to become very close to each other. You might even say they like-liked each other.* This like-like was a big no-no among Rangers because of Da Rules. Potential lab assistant Megan took note of their presumed movie date and used it to blackmail them into giving her the job. Instead of explaining the situation to Commander Shaw since they weren’t actually dating at this point, Zoey caved and handed the job to Megan.

It didn’t last long, because as it turns out Megan was a little shithead. She lied to everybody almost immediately. Zoey finally admitted that she was blackmailed, and Shaw reasonably dropped Megan like a sack of potatoes. While they may have told the Commander that they weren’t dating, they weren’t fooling anyone. Including you, because you’re too smart. They admitted their feelings to each other later at the juice bar. I wonder if there’s laser-blast sounds when two Rangers bump uglies? Anyway.

One of the Channel 10 News cameras caught the Rangers morphing. But oops, someone blasted the memory card during the battle. Zoey’s mom had her camera guy recover the footage. She was so excited to have the Rangers’ identities in the palm of her hand that she told her daughter about it. Zoey explained what the phrase “secret identity” meant, but Mrs. Reeves shrugged it off. Either Zoey needed to kill her mom, or figure out a way to convince her not to put them on blast during prime time.

Zoey volunteered to interview a famous movie star while her mom focused on the Ranger story. It was because of this interview that Mrs. Reeves realized that maybe fame isn’t always good sometimes and she should cancel her big Ranger reveal story. So she did. Good thing Zoey was able to get an actress to appeal specifically to her mother’s emotions, huh?

Hey do you guys remember that Megan girl that everyone hated because she blackmailed a Ranger and also was really annoying? Well “Mayor Daniels” (Evox in disguise) hired her for her killer Beast-X King Zord design, which she embedded with a hot load of lion DNA. Zoey didn’t trust her at first, especially after the Zord went rogue. But Megan showed her that sometimes people can change, even if they almost got you fired from your superhero job as a stepping stone to becoming a *checks notes* …fuckin’ lab assistant.

Oh yeah, so Zoey and Nate like-liked each other. Steel, Nate’s half-robot half-human half-scarab brother, caught on to this fact. Zoey insisted that they were not dating and that Steel should keep his yap shut (I’m paraphrasing) because if they were dating, which they were not, they’d be breaking the rules, which they were totally not.

And then Steel pushed Nate and Zoey to team up as Mayor Evox’s bodyguards to give them an excuse to hang out. On their first mission they couldn’t quite keep their noodles in their pants if you know what I’m sayin’. They lost sight of the Mayor and failed their task. When asked why, Commander Shaw brought up some footage of them almost kissing at the community garden. This is what the Patriot Act was established for.

Later in the day during a fight with Robo-Blaze and Robo-Roxy, Zoey was seriously hurt. Nate jumped in and took the bullet (laser?) before they could deliver the final blow. Enraged, Zoey leapt for the new Spin Saber she left on the ground and boomerang’d it at the Robo-bitches, putting a stop to their nonsense for the day. After seeing this magnificent display of… teamwork, Shaw got rid of the “no Ranger dating” rule, allowing Zoey and Nate to finally be together, Facebook official. I heard they also got a joint bank account.

When each Ranger split up to find a spaceship that belonged to an evil weapons dealer named Ryjack, Zoey found it in an open field, and was told by both Shaw and Devon to stay put until her team arrived. Instead of listening, like a good teammate, she completely ignored their orders and approached the ship. But whoops, it had a self-destruct security feature. Good going! 

Some Gollum lookin’ headass was also nearby looking for weapons. Not knowing whether he was friend or foe, Zoey threw a “compliance collar” at him, leaving him suggestible. When the other Rangers arrived, they recognized him as Keeper, the “mentor” to the Dino Charge Rangers. He was kidnapped by some evil Vivix monsters before they could really figure out what the hell was going on.

Zoey knew it was mostly her fault and personally saw that Keeper was retrieved safe and sound. But hey, if it weren’t for Zoey’s gut instinct to ram herself into danger’s butthole, the Dino Charge Rangers may have never showed up to save Keeper, and perhaps we wouldn’t have gotten the big dino team-up.

But you know what? When Zoey screws up, she’s damn well gonna own up to it. Her brother Mike discovered a dinosaur talon that may have been a breakthrough that would get him a scholarship for college. Zoey’s doofy ass poured acid on it and the thing evaporated. Not only did she confess this to Mike, but she also travelled all the way up a fuckin’ mountain to obtain another one. Girl has a helicopter for a Zord. She climbed. A whole mountain.

After giving Evox the ol’ razzmatazz, Zoey still worked at Grid Battleforce, presumably still as the Yellow Ranger. She also became an advocate for alternative energy solutions that weren’t Morph-X, since that didn’t go very well last time, what with the whole evil virus thing.

RANKING

Zoey lives up to those words she said in the first episode. Anytime there’s a big problem, she doesn’t shy away. She tackles it head-on. Especially when she’s the direct cause of the problem. But dammit, she owns up to her mistakes every time, and I love her for it. She does fall apart a little bit in the second half. But whatever, she’s still pretty solid.

The Beast Morphers Rangers are kinda like a shiny new toy still. Ranking them against these other 25 people feels daunting. I don’t think I can handle it. Who lets me drink before I write these things?

One of the weird and probably counterproductive methods I use to rank these fuckers nowadays is by asking “Which one is she worse than?” Maybe that’s actually the best way to do it? My drunk brain is saying “Below Syd, ahead of Ryan” so Zoey is now the new number 17 on the Children of Zordon. I had a big problem and I solved it. She’d be proud.

Wow my last post was in June? What the fuck? Whatever. Check out my Twitter. And here’s the full list. Don’t forget to tune in next time when I talk about another teenager with attitude. And by “teenager,” I mean like a trillion-year-old caveman named Koda from Dino Charge.